Greetings From Me To You

Welcome to my little home, friendly stranger. Would you like some tea? Perhaps some coffee, or milk, or other beverages. I have plenty. Oh, how rude of me, I almost forgot. My name is Xander, but everyone calls me Kidd. I enjoy many things, notably listening to music (the likes of Squarepusher, Aphex Twin, Bogdan Raczynski, and Daedelus), playing video games all day (such as Blockland, Minecraft, and GMod), or hanging out with my friends. I have a very secret club, only the greatest may join, or even know about it. If you attempt to join, and you are not quite the great man/woman/dark being/etc. you think you are, you will be instantaneously transported to a world of extremely hot plasma, killing instantly. If you betray the club in any way, this will also happen to you. Tread carefully, wise fellow.